I Finally Finished Super Mario Run (after countless hours on the toilet)

While it may be unpleasant to think about, it’s true folks, and you know it. The top-selling game in the industry known as “mobile gaming,” or as I like to call it, “toilet gaming,” is the latest addition to an admittedly short list of games I’ve completed in February.


I’ve been endlessly grinding away in Toad Rally for what seems like an eternity, after securing all of the colored coins months ago. To be honest, I was growing pretty bored with the whole grind, and while the “Gold Goomba” challenge kept things fresh for a little bit, I was back at it, coasting along with Princess Peach, exploiting her ability to chain together jumps on Bowser’s ship level. But as I got over the 2000 Toad hump, a calm came over me and I just started enjoying the game for what it is: a simple running game.

What does it take to 100% Super Mario Run? Well aside from extreme dedication and a high fiber diet, it requires beating all the levels, getting all the colored coins, completing the secret levels, completing all the Gold Goomba punch cards, unlocking all the characters, and buying Peach’s Birthday Cake, the final purchasable item in the game. To add to that last note, the game actually gives you a nice little message hinting that you’ve done all you can do, aside from maxing out your Toads at 9999, a daunting task I have absolutely no interest in completing.

I figure as someone who’s logged plenty of hours on this game, I should give an overall review of it from start to finish, even though there’s not much to tell that I haven’t already touched upon. First off, the obvious question: is it worth $10? To answer that, you need to answer this question for yourself: do I consider gameplay time the most important correlation to a fair price? Because in that case, this game has terrific replay value and probably can last you a good 15-20 hours to complete everything in the game. Will you pay top quality for a polished, beautiful game? Again, I’d say this game is worth $10 for the typical Nintendo polish it has.


However, if you want to rush through the game and you have no interest in spending time actually playing it and completing everything it has to offer, than I’d say you can skip this one. Like most mobile games, it’s not quite meant to be played in short bursts, with mind-numbing repetition the main opposition, and although it’s possible to burn through the entire game at once, it’s pretty much made to be play from 1-10 minutes at a time. This can seem steep for $10, but let’s be honest – people who play mobile games primarily on a cell phone don’t want to part with $.99, let alone $10. You want your games perfect and free, well, prepare to be bombarded with ads. If you want a pure experience with no popups trying to steal your social security number, Super Mario Run is the Nintendo-quality perfection we are used to in the Mario franchise, and $10 is a totally fair price in this guy’s opinion.

Super Mario Run is a case study in the “tricky yet addicting” category of games, playing on the “one more spin!” concept that cause slot machines to draw people in and keep them there for hours. It mostly stayed fresh for me, and while it can get a little frustrating figuring out just how to maximize your Toad return in ‘Rally (hint: never stop jumping and doing tricks!) and coming back with 15 new Toads after busting your ass, or getting all the way through the last Ghost House only to miss the last colored coin, it’s a terrific installment to the Mario series that everyone who loves the franchise and newcomers alike should check out.

One comment

  1. Toilet gaming! Now that’s a new one for me, I always call it handheld gaming. But your name for it sure adds a whole new meaning to it.
    I liked how Mario Run looks, but sadly it’s not the game for me. I couldn’t even make it past the second stage, because I suck at jumping between walls to get up high.


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